In the busom of Kierkegaard.

Kierkegaard is a philosopher.

Yo! Not too bad, only took me a week to make my next entry...

Let's see. I guess it's time for me to give my state of the union address on my stay in Japan.

Or, rather, maybe I'll just outline what my days have been like.

Well, I've been here for over a week now, I guess-- got here Wednesday before last. On Wednesday, I arrived-- safely-- and stayed in that expensive ass hotel adjacent to the airport, Hotel Nikko. Way too expensive, but I did get to Skype my mom and enjoy the TV.

On Thursday, I took my heavy ass luggage with me to Kanazawa. Which was a mess. For one, I barely knew what I was doing-- even though my Japanese should be good enough to get me around and stuff, hell, it should be better than my Chinese, so I should have been able to manage. But I get flustered in new situations if I'm alone[not as much as I used to though, haha] and so going to ticket windows and trying to express where I wanted to go was tiring. And then I missed my transfer. So, I was supposed to arrive at Kanazawa Station at 2 something-- instead, I got there an hour later. Luckily, I ran into Andrew, another classmate from my university, and another student here, Beck, on the train. Talk about coincidence-- they were just coming back from Korea.

My coordinators were worried. Andrew texted-- or rather, emailed...people don't use SMS messages over here--, etc.

And thusly, I got dropped off here. They asked if I wanted dinner. I said I was tired. So I got a tour of the dorm and went to sleep.

Friday. Um. Oh, well, I think Makiko pretty much toured me around for the day-- we got Chinese food for lunch that didn't taste all *that* Chinese, or at least not Chinese in the way that I like it[greasy and cheap], and then Makiko took me to the city hall to get my alien registration pass[necessary, apparently, if you want to get a phone, open a bank account, leave the country-- all of which I want to do]. After that, we went around, looking at a museum, going to the 99yen store[you guessed it-- the equivalent to the 99 cent store!], etc. Pretty chill stuff, riding around with Makiko-san.

And then...it started. My next date with Makiko wasn't until Monday.

Okay, so the undercurrent of all this is that I'm hella disappointed with the entire program. Now, while I suppose I could look at this as a free excursion, this whole "Japan" thing, let's say I don't. Let's say I look at myself as a normal student paying tuition without any financial aid/scholarships, like some of my other Tufts classmates. Um. I'm "paying" 40K a year for you to not pick me up from the airport, put me in a campus far, far removed from the actual city, drop me off in a box-like room, give me a three day orientation, etc. I also feel as if I'm the only one out of the Tufts students who feels this way, which isn't surprising, since they don't really have much to compare it to.

Truth be told, the orientation is a lot better than just...arriving here by yourself, like the non-Tufts students were. But in China, we were babied to the extreme: got picked up by our RD/coordinator at the airport, driven to our dorm, showed around the campus, had access to a dining hall in our dorm[important!], had little help notes of how to order food in Chinese, a month long orientation re-acquainting us with Chinese before our placement tests and touring us around the nearby area/country. The rooms in Japan might be a slight step up-- bigger furniture, a kitchen[though no stove...um]. The bathroom over here is a downgrade though, definitely. The dorm itself is also a downgrade-- in China, we had elevators, straight hallways, people to clean up the halls/take out the trash, a dining hall on the first floor, etc. Taking out the trash here is hella complicated, which I'll get to at another time. It was also just prettier-- this dorm is just cement and cold.

So, coming out of China, I'm pretty disappointed. But it might just be easier to do stuff in China, since everything is so cheap. Mm...cheap.

I really started getting angry starting Friday, though. When I got in Makiko's car, she asked me if I had breakfast. Now, as I'd arrived the day before, and my tour from one of the student advisors did not include restaurants/eateries/whatever, where was this breakfast supposed to be found? Or dinner the night before, for that matter?[Interesting point-- I heard Japanese people don't eat three times a day? I'm not sure, to be honest]

My ignorance only became sharper as I grew hungrier over the weekend. So, I ask a classmate-- what do people do to eat? Cook on their little hotplates. Dining halls are closed. Uhm. How do I get food to cook? Go to Jusco. Where's that? Huh? And he was busy with his girlfriend, so I didn't want to bother him too much.

On Saturday, as I was trying to find Jusco, just after I found the convenience store, I ran into Beck. She's very friendly, Australian, talkative and she was on her way to Juso herself, so I accompanied her.

It was just, like. If there is ONE THING IN THIS WORLD that I have on my mind every other second, it just MIGHT be food. So, the lack thereof can really drive me to do crazy things-- browse white nationalist forums like Stormfront, for example.[That was a trip...] Anyway, when I told Makiko on Monday, "Um, hi, but you keep asking me if I ate breakfast...where do I do this, exactly?" Haha. Apparently, my student tour guide was supposed to show me-- oops.

Okay, so now I know that dining halls are open. Great, great, great. Though they close at like 2 pm? Haha.

The weekend is pretty much characterized by my worrying about my next meal. So let's skip that.

What else on Monday. Makiko took me to the Kenrokuen Gardens, which are apparently one of Japan's three special gardens, or something. One is in Okayama, that I went to five years ago when I did my homestay. Didn't realize. We also went to see a castle.

To be honest, as much as this whole "Yay I'm in Asia thing" is pretty fun, the whole touring the historical parks/buildings/whatever bores me really fast. I think it's really just that while I might like the Japanese *language* I'm really not interested in the bowing, or the sushi, or the samurai, or the castles, or the whatever. Maybe I was in high school, but now? Nah. So I felt bad for Makiko, who had to drag an unexcited student around from place to place, though I tried to feign interest. I think all of the other kids here are Japanese majors.

Later that night was fun, however. It was apparently this girl Miki's birthday-- Miki's a student advisor in our dorm. So we all went out to nomihoudai-- which I guess is just a downgrade of an open bar? It's pretty much all you can drink for an hour. Which is a bad thing for me, since that just means I have to get my money's worth.

There were lots of people there though, so I got to meet everyone. "You studied in China!? Wow! Blah blah." Another problem that I need to address at another time is the girl problem that I'm having now. Um. "He's cute."? What do I do about that? And then you want to add me on facebook, where I have myself as interested in men? It's just awkward, I guess. I don't know why I've been having such problems with outness, but that's another entry.

Anyway, after about my third Awamori or so[Awamori is this Okinawan rice liquor-- it's similar to Vodka in alcohol level, but definitely easier to take], some of the kids were bowing out/eating/going for girly drinks. Whatever. The Slovenian girl and I kept going-- she's fun, too bad she's leaving next week.

Anyway, after Nomihoudai, we went a bunch of places-- Karaoke, where I got beer; McDonalds, where I got a burger and made everyone wait for me, apparently; some bar-restaurant place, where I did more shots of whiskey. Man, I was pretty messed up. The funny thing is, while I remember the night for the most part, I don't remember getting back to my room. But when I woke up the next morning, my head was pounding, my computer was in shambles[I usually use my computer from my bed, so I suppose we had a fight...my computer lost, clearly], I was wearing my pajamas, my facebook status said I was in love with someone-who-won't-be-named, etc. Weirdness. I guess that counts as blacking out? Haha.

Okay, so that was Monday. The rest of the week has been pretty calm-- I've just been hanging with people, trying to make friends, etc. I also have been studying a lot. I'm really concerned about what level of Japanese I'm going to take. The lowest level is AA, then it goes B-->C1-->C2-->D-->E-->F. Now, I should be better than my Tufts classmates-- while I started freshman year in Japanese 1, sophomore year I skipped out of two classes and moved into junior year Japanese[Japanese 21, 22], while they were still doing sophomore year Japanese.[Japanese 3, 4] But I'm not sure anymore-- Korey, who did the best on the placement test out of my Tufts classmates, did this intense Middlebury program the summer before and wound up in level C2. They certainly all speak faster than me, but that probably is because they've been here for a good six months already, while I'm still in Chinese mode. I was looking at Korey's textbook, and other than like two or three grammar patterns, I covered all of it back home already.[whether I can still use it properly is a different question, haha] Anyway, like with China, I have these dream goals-- for China, I wanted to get in level 4 Chinese.[Highest level is 6/7; I didn't make it to 4, got into 3.5...BUT I happened to land into the best class ever, so I'm not too disappointed] For Japan, I want to get into level E, since classes over here seem easier. We'll see. Luckily, the placement test is written, so my bad spoken Japanese won't be an indicator of my actual level.

So, that's academics. Um, I went out drinking again with the kids yesterday-- another nomihoudai. Pretty fun. Afterwards, McDonalds-- seems like a staple. Then we just hung out, went to Circle K, which is a nearby 24 hour convenience store. Etc. Wound up in bed like 2 or 3.

And that has pretty much been my Japanese adventure. Nothing too exciting. A few interesting tangentials:

1. People don't sake bomb in Japan!? I was asking about it, and apparently Japanese people don't sake bomb. I was shocked. Another American fraud!?

2. I miss China. And Chinese. Desperately. I mean, Japan is whatever, but I wasn't joking when I said I had the best class ever in China. We were amazing, all of us were like BFFs. The Koreans, who dominated the class, were amazing. So were the Japanese. And the Americans, the Euros and everyone else too, of course. In fact, I'm thinking of going back in April, if I can get my alien registration card.[I love, love, love having a stipend from Tufts...haha] My placement test is the 7th, so I figure if I can get my registration card the 1st, then I can fly out immediately and...holla! Each time I go on facebook and see new pictures, or talk to my old classmates on MSN, I just get nostalgic.[Which isn't to say I want to be there forever; China is certainly good in limited doses. The US is still the way to go.]

3. There are gay bars in Kanazawa. As great as straight kids are, really, it's just. Man, straight people can be so boring. I need to figure out how to check out these gay bars.

4. One of my coordinators found out info about my old homestay for me! Wow, throwback. Like, five years ago. Apparently my homestay partner is, like, out of college and has a full time job already. Geez, how depressing. But I'm gonna stop by their house and go to the school on Monday I hope, which should be fun. Very excited; I really liked that family. And apparently there are two kids from my high school as well, though I graduated before they started, so I probably don't know them.

I can't believe 2005 is so...long ago. I'm already about to graduate college...geez.

Alright, I don't do depression. I guess I'm gonna make my way to the dining hall.[I went there for the first time yesterday-- that also deserves a story! I swear, being Black in Asia...it never ends, it never ends, haha]

Later.